Thursday, January 31, 2008

Bad Poetry

I used to write poetry. I was young (definition - anything less than 85, by which definition I am STILL young), in love (still am for whatever it is worth), full of dreams. Life happens, things change, people move on. For a long time the only poetry I've written has been really bad outpourings of undeniable emotion, best never to see the light of day. This morning though, the rising sun painting the sky inspired me to write a little and so I give you the results, BAD POETRY!

I Miss You

Reflected sky
Pink in western window,
Pink in the east.
I miss you.

Sunrises we shared,
Wisteria streaks
In bubble gum skies.
I miss you.

Pineapple mornings
I’ll ever be denied.
Dreams stillborn.
I miss you.

I am the fool,
Giving up what I can’t have
To keep what I don’t want.
I miss you.

13 comments:

Trée said...

No such thing as bad poetry when it is written with a sincere heart. The heart is too great to be corralled with our petty human labels of good and bad, right or wrong. It just is in all its magnificent glory--just like this poem. Thanks for sharing Wamblings. :-)

Robert Crane said...

"dreams stillborn"

that is a brilliant couple of words.

talented, very talented.

Wamblings said...

bob, Thanks. I am a musician by trade but I really consider myself an artist. I paint pictures with words. Words are how I see. From early childhood I wasn't content with "cow" if I could better name it "Holstein". "cow" is ambiguous. "Holstein" is rich in black and white patches with a heavy udder pregnant with frothy white milk for which stream the cats will line up waiting impatiently till Uncle disconnects the Teat Cup and directs the strippings in their direction.

Nabeel said...

What you wrote falls more in the lines of story telling, I think.

Wamblings said...

Nabeel, Thank you for stopping by and posting. Often my poems tell stories if one has the key to unlock them. I love to write. Playing my violin and writing my pictures, this is my art. Speaking of writing pictures, I had to laugh at the post you had of the hand written credit card bills.

Kat Mortensen said...

I like this quite a lot. It's a nice little haiku feel with the poignant refrain at the end of each stanza. Not "bad poetry" at all if you ask me.
Kat

I'm adding your blog to my "blogfellows" list - please come by mine often - check out some of my other nature poems - and you might really get a kick out of "Peri-menopausal Blues".

Wamblings said...

Kathleen, Thanks for stopping by and for posting your kind comment. I will pop in as often as I can to read your poetry. I've been on 360 and MySpace for a year or two now but this is a whole new forum for me and I'm struggling up the learning curve. Today I learned there is a shout box. Who knew?

I read your peri-menopause piece. Delightful. I think what I miss most of what menopause has taken from me is my mind. I imagine menopause will end up front and center in my blog more than a few times. :P

Is blogfellows list the same as friends and neighborhood (of which I've yet to figure out the difference or why sometimes the little box says something about friends while other times it says neighborhood)? *staggers up learning curve*

Kat Mortensen said...

Glad you enjoyed the poem - we are all in this together, aren't we?
Blogfellows is just the term I've used for my bloglog, or links to blogs I read and enjoy. You can call it anything you like.
I tried two different versions of Shoutbox at two different times and noone seems to use them, so I got rid of them. It's all trial and error...it also seems, you're only as good as your latest post, which is rather sad. I've been resurrecting some of my early poetry and it seems to be a hit.
Kat

Wamblings said...

Kathleen, I'm thinking of posting a few of my archived poems but right now am hoping for more feedback on my short story hook so don't want to bury it beneath other things. Perhaps later in the week I can resurrect some poetry. I've written some things that would fit nicely in the "humor blog" category. Maybe use them for filler when I haven't any fresh funny thing to say. *cheesy grin*

niji said...

This is beautiful...

Wamblings said...

Niji, I'm glad you found my blog and glad you enjoyed my poetry.

j said...

Last comment and I'm leaving, I promise. I don't see this as bad, just more straight forward than your other poem. I really like the last few verses. Those could stand alone. Jennifer (and GOOD BYE for now)

Wamblings said...

Thanks Jen. I'm in the process of preparing a manuscript of my poetry now for possible publication. Earlier this week I sent off 6 poems to a contest. I'm finally far enough away from the poems that I find I can do some rewriting of them.

The funny thing is that I've never been all that fond of poetry. Oh sure, I memorized a few and can quote them still but I was always a novel reading kind of gal. Then I started writing poetry and reading my friends works (the old scratch each other's back thing) and discovered poetry could be kind of cool, or it could be very bad. I hope most of mine is kind of cool but some of it is really bad. :P To folks who don't like poetry probably a lot of it is really bad. I kind of like this poem. I think I'm pretty good at coming up with succinct words that portray sharp images. To me poetry is largely about economy of words. How sharp an image can you create with the fewest possible number of words.